Thursday, 26 May 2016

Self Observation

I am one of life's observers.  I don't interact much and feel more comfortable being the supporting act rather than the star.  I have worried for years about lacking ambition and when I was employed I had no desire to move up the ranks and was happy to stay put.  I feel that my lack of ambition has been viewed negatively by past employers and colleagues who only see promotion as a benchmark of progress/success in work.

Trying to make sense of myself and how others perceive me, I took a Myers-Briggs personality test.  My personality indicator came out as ISFJ which is introversion, sensing, feeling, judging.  I think the test accurately describes me. 

I have recently found out that I was born under a balsamic moon and that cancer was in my mid heaven at the time of my birth. 

In western astrology I have: sun in Aries, rising sign Libra, Moon in Pisces

In vedic (jyotish) astrology: sun in Pisces, rising sign Virgo, Moon in Aquarius

I don't know if it is helpful (as yet) to collate all this (useless?) information about myself.   I do know that I want grounding though and if putting myself in various labelled boxes helps me to do this it will all be worthwhile.

Monday, 23 May 2016

Mood Lifting Colour

Good morning!  The colour of this California Poppy should certainly wake you up and lift your spirits!  It was a lovely surprise to see the seeds germinate and rise up from the soil again this year and they are bigger and bushier than ever before. 

I can almost feel the Californian sunshine emanating from its petals!  I hope this burst of colour will send positive vibes your way and set you off on a great week ahead.

Saturday, 21 May 2016

Creating Without Purpose

It is so liberating to create without the end having to justify the means.  For so long I have tried to find ways of raising an income by making things.  I have now decided to put that on the back burner and concentrate on being creative for the sake of it without the pressure of money being the end goal.  I feel like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

Because I don't have a paid job I have felt guilty having so many creative hobbies.  I thought that if I could combine doing what I love with receiving an income then I couldn't be accused of time wasting.  From now on I am going to create for me even though it may be perceived as being selfish.  If I could get any income from doing the things I love it will be the icing on the cake, but I am not going to live a life of regret not doing what makes me happy even if it doesn't bring home a wage.

These last few weeks I have felt lighter and happier (despite being back on the sugar again)!  I play with paint, I stick things down, cut things out, collage and doodle 'til my heart's content.  By concentrating on my own happiness I believe that it is having a positive influence on those closest to me.  I may even get back to baking cakes again.............!!!

Saturday, 14 May 2016

Mid May Garden

I am still on a blogging break but wanted to record the garden's progress so far this month.  Things of note include the white wisteria which always has more foliage than flowers.

The wild patch has been overtaken with pretty blue borage. EDITED:  Thanks to Toffeeapple's observation I now know that this is not borage and is in fact pentaglottis sempervirens otherwise known as bugloss or alkanet. 

The strawberry patch is covered in white flowers with little berries beginning to form in the centres.

Monday, 2 May 2016

Step Away From the Blog..................

Each day I look at my blog. Not once. Not twice, but multiple times throughout the day just in case somebody has left a comment.  It is getting quite exhausting and habitual and slightly OCD.  I do this in the hope that I find a nugget of inspiration, information or a lead to something.......................and I don't even know what that 'something' is that I am looking for.  I also spend a fair chunk of time looking and commenting on other people's blogs.  Today I have excelled myself in having such a blogfest and now I sit hunched with aching shoulders and blurry eyes.  Something has to give.

As well as the blog I constantly check my twitter and g mail accounts.  I really need to break out of this habit as it is having a destructive effect on me and taking away precious time that I could be doing something constructive.

I really need to cut down on time spent at the computer and with this in mind I am going to step away from the blog.  Not for long.  Hopefully.  Just a breather.

Saturday, 30 April 2016

Looking Back to Move Forward

I have been tying myself up in knots for the last couple of days trying to analyse vedic (Jyotish) and western astrology charts to come up with some sort of direction for my 'career'.  It has taken me to the brink of despair discovering unfavourable things in my vedic chart.  I have neither the time, money or expertise to explore the vedic route any further but I am sure that the conclusions I formed wouldn't be so bad if seen in context with other information in my birth chart. 

Surrendering to trying to find out a career via those two conflicting systems I looked to the midheaven point at which I was born.  If I have my information correct, it seems that cancer is my midheaven point.  This stays the same whether I follow the vedic or western system.  For now I will let this new information be my guiding light.

Talking of looking to the past, I recently bought a collection of original  'Henry' cigarette cards from the 1930's.  I have no idea what I am going to do with them yet but I liked their humour and the colours used.  They are in great condition considering they were created around 80 years ago!

I like the back of the card stating that the cigarettes were less irritating to the throat than other cigarettes.   How times have changed!

Tuesday, 26 April 2016

The Trail of the Hummingbird

A few weeks back I watched an interview with Oprah Winfrey and Elizabeth Gilbert - author of Eat, Pray, Love.  Elizabeth was talking about always having a passion for writing and knowing that is all she ever wanted to do.  She recalled how she had received an angry letter from a woman who frustratingly didn't know what her passion was and put a lot of thought into her response.   She said that some know their passion and follow it and others follow the path of the hummingbird, following their curiosity.  She  made the analogy of the hummingbird flitting from tree to tree trying out different things and maybe finding a passion whilst doing so.  Elizabeth's words have given me a lot of comfort as I also felt very much like the woman who had contacted her.  I have many interests and find it difficult to commit to just one.   I live a curiosity driven life and am very much following the trail of the hummingbird with the hope that it will lead to one passion.

Whilst flitting from 'tree to tree' I landed upon' inchies'.  I have been wanting to make inchies for ages -  pieces of artwork measuring 1 x 1 inch.  The ones above are made from stamped card scraps that I painted over with water colour paints and wax crayons.  I then cut them up into 1 x 1 inch squares,  stamped over with some tiny stamps, added some redundant peel offs and highlighted areas with white and glitter gel pens.  I outlined them with gold pen to make the designs pop.  These were so much fun to make.  Now where shall I hop to next?